Hallelujah

I decided to make some important changes and boundaries on my own behalf, including taking a six-month hiatus from both my writing groups. I do miss them, but honestly, it was a good decision. Having Fridays free enables me to do two things: participate more at the Zen center and study Haitian dance with my absolute favorite teacher, Shawn. I can't do everything; my health has been so fragile that right now I can work and I can, to some degree, write, and dance because that is so crucial to keeping me healthy, and the other things have to go.

My sister died after having lupus and related health problems for eighteen years. I wonder at times how long I have (I have also had lupus for eighteen years as of December). Zen has brought me to a place of peace about my own impermanence, with a sense of "yes, of course there will come a time when I won't be here," and that is a resolved fact of life with me. I have not been through as much as others go through, but what I endure is plenty for me.