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Monday, February 10, 2014

True Valentine

Just got an email from someone in my old Thursday night African dance class, wondering how I was doing and inviting me to class, which of course got me crying again.  CG keeps reminding me about something a friend of his said when they were at CalTech:  the wheel of karma grinds slow and exceedingly fine.  I told him that all I would really like to do is stop crying every few days.  I don't care about karma--whatever that is for another person, is not my place to determine, and in reality I want only good for people.   I've thought and done enough cruel things verbally and emotionally in the wake of all this, and do not wish to go back to that behavior nor wish life's cruelty upon other people.

Still, being unable to go to that class has opened up one thing:  having Haitian dance, for now, as my path.  Very few people from Thursday night go to that class and I honestly don't want to see any of them right now, kind as all the emails and cards from that class have been.  I resonate a lot with S., my Haitian dance teacher, because he's an innately good, sensitive person, greatly cares about me, has been through a lot in life, and is a magnificent dancer (I frankly have learned zero about dance from the Thursday class--it was just a place to have fun and get a workout).  I feel connected to a culture and a way of living, and a history, in  the Haitian dance class.  I plan to dress in black and purple for Friday's class, in honor of Baron Samedi and the guede.  Baron Samedi can be my true valentine this year.

I truly hope that no one who comes to my little corner of the world ever experiences pain like I have for the last couple of months.  Seriously.  Anyways, here is a cool depiction of Baron Samedi (he's drinking rum infused with hot peppers, which is known as "Haitian tear gas" for a very good reason):

I actually like this picture because it shows Le Baron as a rather handsome guy (for a skeleton, I guess!) as he likes nice clothes, rum, and cigars (also black coffee--when I am working with him as a ritual, I leave him a cup of black coffee in a special place in the woods, a natural altar made of a stump where a tree fell down years ago.  I always put a small drop of rum in the coffee, and the next day, I use the coffee/rum as a libation).

 Also, if you look closely, the right eye of his sunglasses is punched out; that is so he can keep an eye on people!