A Step Towards Painting

Moving forward sadly and slowly, but forward.  Had a mostly good couple of days so far.  Just deep sadness on this Thursday--really feel the annihilation of my old life, and nothing risen so far but a sense of self as fragile as a shell.  

I started to feel as if I wanted to paint again, and got as far as masking the paper to the board (to prevent the paper from rippling once it is "watercolored").  I masked it (messy job as the masking tape tore).  Then I had an urge to mask a few places on the paper itself (to create white spaces after the colorwashes).  I don't know what it will be--probably just some "scribbling" paintwise--I am so out of practice.  Maybe I'll show this as it goes through different stages.  Anything to make myself enter more and more into life, as it continues to beckon me forward.