To read an excerpt from the book, please click on the following link:

Wednesday, December 31, 2014


2014 was the worst year of grieving in my life so far. I have gone into another phase of it, but this will take years to really get over. I feel a kinship with all who grieve. I realize he would have tried to censor this book I am writing, as my poetry and other novels were censored and made fun of to the point where I simply stopped sharing anything. Still, the good things were overwhelmingly there.

It is hard to realize he was glad to get rid of me, preferring an ideal that does not exist anywhere in the world. I am grateful that most of his family members love and respect me still.  I do not blame anyone on his side of the family who is protective of him, but it is sad...not delving deeper into why this person has particular struggles does no one any good.

I still believe that people who do shady things and have creepy, manipulative intentions eventually come to answer for their actions; I need do nothing (unless asked to provide input), just let Spirit work. It may take years, but life catches up to most people who choose the "self will run riot" life eventually. May it be so for all those who hide a life of harm behind a benign mask. May all those who do not perhaps be an example to those still struggling.

I adopted my sweet Thistle this year. Raising her is 90 percent of my life.
I see her bloom and know that this great redirection has a purpose, so I stay the course. I love her school and feel she will do well there. I like commanding some respect as an older parent, so different from when I was in my twenties.

I began a book about Asha Veil and the writing, though immensely hard, is the very best I have done. I am amazed and grateful at the doors which have opened for me I am grateful my own trauma and grief can be put to good use, to be sensitive to those who knew and loved Asha, and who deal with the most unimaginable grief and loss.

I retired from university teaching, gratefully. It is not possible for me to raise a young child and teach at that level. I will miss San Jose State and am grateful for the time I spent there.

My house in Lompico is coming along with repairs.

My family gave me a new computer.

I am grateful for so much, and especially for the readers of this little saga of mine.

Wishing you all a blessed new year.