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Tuesday, September 22, 2015


I had one huge screw-up in my performance with my dance troupe, which I had to cover.  I am not blaming anyone, but the type of dance I do is improvisational, and we change dance movements through cues from each dancer--that is essentially part of it.  There is always a lead dancer, and the one in my group did not give a clear cue, in my opinion.  I am not blaming her, but it was part of the screw-up, and is a move that is easy to screw up.  I have to figure out how to cover it, as I also don't pick it up in class very well.

So, I gave an excellent performance otherwise, and what do I focus on?  The screw up!  It's time to start turning off some of those critical sides of myself.  I have them for everything: the way I failed to be a good mother to my children in every way (they deserved no less and I know I could have done better), keeping the house spotless, and other ways I can't let go of having done something "wrong".  It is nearly impossible to let some things go, and even immoral to do so, but there are small areas I can let go: such as doing a wrong step in a dance. In fact, no one blamed me but myself.  If anyone did secretly, their day for a screw-up is coming.  I've seen the person who invented this dance make royal screw-ups.  It's a performing art.

So, I forgive myself and move on to just trying to do better.

Here is a picture of me from the performance, still a proud and happy dancer despite it all.