If Not, Who Will?

Continuing with my conversation the other night with an old friend, online, I think the best answer to his questions about this book is that if someone does not write the stories of these women, who will?  To me, writing is courage, and all writers are given their place to act in courage.  I can't write in certain modes and genres, but what I do best, other than poetry, is nonfiction.  I can be a witness to what happened to Asha, and also to my friend Anne Swanke.  She was murdered by a serial killer in the 80s...another woman who was a musician, a singer, and my friend also.  She was the last person I spoke to before I left my college (after having been through horrific things...great place; it's one of the reasons I don't like San Diego: I think many not-so-quaint people are attracted to that area, including those with malignant intentions).  I'm going to write a little bit about Anne, too, I think.

Well, it seems there was a small, happy band of folks last night at the First Night write-in for Nanowrimo Santa Cruz.  I am glad people went.  I'm sad for all the folks who won't be back: there were so many people last year, such happiness, and yet when there is an undercurrent of shadow and ulterior motive, these things cannot last.  Many people said to me that they would never participate here again.

Still, there is always redemption and a new start and chance for "normal" folks (emphasis on being funny about the word "normal")...people are so much more than the sum of their errors and if we all stopped participating in life because of something wrong we did, nothing on this planet would ever get done.  I'm not talking about a sick murderer like McClish or David Allen Lucas, who took my friend Anne's life...this has to do with "ordinary" people who lose their way and endeavor to find it again.  Sometimes that direction means a powerful redirection by Spirit...if you don't get called on destructive habits, you could get a worse consequence down the road. In Al-Anon, when we begin to make amends to others for our wrongs (which we commit to never doing again), the first amends is  to ourselves. To be able to say you are sorry to others without blaming them, and make a true amends, is to come to a place of humility (real humility, not self-flagellation) that is necessary for making true change . It has nothing to do with guilt; it has everything to do with honesty and admitting that we are part of a community and our actions affect others.

Well, the rain has begun and is always a sign of new hope and redemption, for me.